Well, someone has finally lost an eye. The GOP thought fooling around with that sharp stick, well, a bundle of sharp sticks, would be fun, that Trump was just a joke. But now, finally, the GOP has lost an eye. And should we be surprised? Maybe. But the GOP shouldn’t be shocked in the least. They are the ones who, to use another colloquialism, let the fox in the henhouse…a fox with a truckload of really sharp sticks. This is not your father’s GOP, and they brought it all upon themselves.

Sharp Stick Number One: The Teabaggers

Yes, the Grand Old Party accepted the Tea Party as its own when it let them dictate the Congressional agenda. Yes, with the state of current events, with government shutdowns, downgrades of the United States credit rating and all the rest, we see the GOP allowing the Tea Party Nutjobs being allowed to run the show, and Boehner was in no shape to stop it (see stick number 2 below). And they brought their racism, sexism and homophobia along with them. That was big ol’ stick number one.

Sharp Stick Number Two: Obstructionism, and “John Boehner isn’t good at his job.” 

Sharp stick number two is a forked stick, as the two pointy parts work together with a single thrust. Stopping the Obama Administration from having any success was goal number one of everyone’s favorite tortoise, Mitch McConnell. He was very clear in his support of these blockades: The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president.” Combine that with John Boehner’s incompetence, and his inability to even pass what the standard-issue, typically conservative member of the party would approve, and attempting to assure that the first African American president gets noting done, causing yet another stick to poke its way onto the scene.

Sharp Stick Number Three: Forcing The Hand of POTUS

Executive orders are the way that the U.S. president can circumvent this sort of obstructionist bullpucky. And the GOP, with their lack of compromise, and playing to the new, vocal, Tea Party base, gave President Obama no other way to accomplish some basic governance…and, by the way, rallying support of the Democratic base in the process. Great strategy, GOP.

Sharp Stick Number Four: Rrrrrrrreince Priebus and Co. Take Trump’s Campaign as a Joke

Well, Rrrrrreince, who’s laughing now? Last week, it actually came out that Trump never expected to win the primary. (My bored, rich megalomaniac theory proven right…just sayin’…) We have to go back to the Mittens for President campaign on this one. The Republican National Committee, in their post-mortem of the last two presidential races, decided that part of the problem with Mittens not winning was how long the primary season dragged on. So, in order to make certain that the lead candidate locked the nomination early, they pulled a switcherooo on the early primary states, thus ensuring that the early frontrunner pretty much locks up the nomination. Great idea, eh? Yeah, it was, until they got hit with sharp stick number five.

Sharp Stick Number Five: The Trump Candidacy

Which leads us up to the stick that landed in the Republican Party’s collective eye: the unlikely candidacy of Donald J. Trump. Little did they know that Trump’s hilarious, surreal, performance art level campaign, with his racist, misogynistic, birther-believing, homophobic, megalomaniacal statements and outright lies would appeal to the base: the new GOP base. The new GOP: a base full of haters that had been drawn to the party’s sharp sticks numbers one and two, who took the tea party, birther-believing, racists and women-haters into their tent. And lo and behold, look who voted him in? Rrreince and Paul Ryan are suddenly surprised when 3/4 of likely Republican voters make the guy the GOP Nominee. Amazing. “Fox, come on into the henhouse. There’s plenty to eat and we’re happy to have you.”

So, after playing with a big ol’ bundle of those sharp sticks, are we really surprised when the GOP pokes an eye out? Here they are with Trump as the actual, official, genuine nominee of the Republican Party. Too late now, Rrrrreince and Paul. You’ve allowed your party to blind itself. There will be no brokered convention (sorry, Paul. Better luck not wanting the job next time), no way to redeem the soul of the party. Just a Trump candidacy. The people have spoken. Your people. Your base. The voters who actually go to the polls. As a Democrat, all I can say is a hearty thank you, Gentlemen. With a nominee like that, we don’t need to explain to our base why we need to vote. Thanks for creating the biggest reason for Dems to get out to the polls in November. And a word of advice, Rrrreince: next time, don’t play with sharp sticks.

It’s been a wild ride this year, my fellow Politicos. Any other sticks in the road that I’ve neglected to add to the bundle? Add your two cents below, and keep fighting the good fight.